a normal heights sky sounds like Air
on a Monday off night
Monday, February 15, 2010
Thursday, February 11, 2010
gentleness
today at yoga we did a little Om exercise
we chanted 3 really loud Oms
followed by the 3 most delicate and quiet Oms we had
it was interesting how it was much easier
to almost 'scream' the Oms than to chant them
gently, kindly...
the whole class shared the same feeling
the chanting experiment reminded me of
a piece of lyrics from an old The Smitsh's song:
I Know It's over
i am not sure why, but a sentence from it
ot stuck in my head a long time ago,
'It takes guts to be gentle and kind'
maybe 'cause i used to listen that CD endlessly,
The Queen is Dead
and Morrissey's lyrics/singing
make each song an unforgettable piece
like on this one
It's so easy to laugh
It's so easy to hate
It takes strength to be gentle and kind
...
It's so easy to laugh
It's so easy to hate
It takes guts to be gentle and kind
a superb piece of some indie alternative rock philosophy?
sure a very Zen and enlightened sentence
full of an aloof dignity that conveys
one to feel at peace, no matter what
well, it does that for me
so, when i am mad sometimes
and i wanna scream, or 'renegade'
about life, complain to myself
on one of those sulky states
i sing to myself...
It's so easy to laugh
It's so easy to hate
It takes guts to be gentle and kind
and in my head, of course i hear Morrissey voice
not mine
and tonight was not the case
i was not angry, and not mad
on the contrary
but the chanting experiment reminded
of the strength that quietness requires
&
maybe, next time you are mad
you can sing it along too
and transform the rage into forgiveness
and the sadness into hope
the song is actually about a lost love
a desperate broken-heart song
but that's not the reason why i think of it
it's only the It takes guts to be gentle and kind
part, that got stuck
but when i repeat it
the Oms roll quieter, smoother, and kinder
like a wave done with her duty
and gently retrieving to el mar
unwinding this week, for a Holiday weekend
i get ready with
a small beer, a pillow, and good sweet nights
we chanted 3 really loud Oms
followed by the 3 most delicate and quiet Oms we had
it was interesting how it was much easier
to almost 'scream' the Oms than to chant them
gently, kindly...
the whole class shared the same feeling
the chanting experiment reminded me of
a piece of lyrics from an old The Smitsh's song:
I Know It's over
i am not sure why, but a sentence from it
ot stuck in my head a long time ago,
'It takes guts to be gentle and kind'
maybe 'cause i used to listen that CD endlessly,
The Queen is Dead
and Morrissey's lyrics/singing
make each song an unforgettable piece
like on this one
It's so easy to laugh
It's so easy to hate
It takes strength to be gentle and kind
...
It's so easy to laugh
It's so easy to hate
It takes guts to be gentle and kind
a superb piece of some indie alternative rock philosophy?
sure a very Zen and enlightened sentence
full of an aloof dignity that conveys
one to feel at peace, no matter what
well, it does that for me
so, when i am mad sometimes
and i wanna scream, or 'renegade'
about life, complain to myself
on one of those sulky states
i sing to myself...
It's so easy to laugh
It's so easy to hate
It takes guts to be gentle and kind
and in my head, of course i hear Morrissey voice
not mine
and tonight was not the case
i was not angry, and not mad
on the contrary
but the chanting experiment reminded
of the strength that quietness requires
&
maybe, next time you are mad
you can sing it along too
and transform the rage into forgiveness
and the sadness into hope
the song is actually about a lost love
a desperate broken-heart song
but that's not the reason why i think of it
it's only the It takes guts to be gentle and kind
part, that got stuck
but when i repeat it
the Oms roll quieter, smoother, and kinder
like a wave done with her duty
and gently retrieving to el mar
unwinding this week, for a Holiday weekend
i get ready with
a small beer, a pillow, and good sweet nights
Sunday, February 07, 2010
frau Kitty and the rain
this happened on Saturday,
it was raining the whole day
so frau Kitty couldn't go out and play...
the rain, mocking frau Kitty
frau Kitty's eyes asking why it rains?
how can we stop this so i can go out and play?
it was raining the whole day
so frau Kitty couldn't go out and play...
the rain, mocking frau Kitty
frau Kitty's eyes asking why it rains?
how can we stop this so i can go out and play?
Saturday, February 06, 2010
reading Paul Bowles on my patio, and Kenzaburō Ōe before yoga and the in kitchen
i have read a couple of Japanese authors
some books i got as gifts from my friend Lisa
[post from May 2006, about an e-mail from her on Japanese authors]
and some i got myself
so I've read the elegant and superb Yukio Mishima,
the visual strangeness and symbolism of Kōbō Abe's
The Kangaroo Notebook...
the story of a man who sprouted radishes on his shins
to later travel on his hospital bed accompanied by a vampire nurse
and other surreal characters to even more surreal places
yes! it is a very strange book...
but also, I've been delighted and thankful for having spent many hours
entertained by the postmodernism of masterful Haruki Murakami
with his collections of short stories,
the Rat's appearances in A Wild Sheep Chase, and
the adventures of tormented teenager Kafka
and mister Nakata and his friends the cats on
Kafka on the Shore
and now i finally read another famous Japanese author
Kenzaburō Ōe,
i read 2 short stories
Teach Us to Outgrow Our Madness, and
Aghwee The Sky Monster
another gift from Lisa too
the stories are both a mixture of reality and imagination
images and sentences that leave you after reading
a similar sensation to having waked up from a
visually overcharged strange dream
so Ōe, what i've been reading when i arrive
early to the Yoga studio, but also in my kitchen
while waiting for the water to boil for tea
...
these surreal visions that drip into everyday reality
seem to be a common theme in modern Japanese literature
along with references to the Western World reliquaries
like the pork noodles in broth accompanied by a Pepsi-Cola
that the fat man and his mentally challenged son Mori
share in the tale of Teach Us to Outgrow Our Madness
or the reference to Jimmy Stewart and his gigantic
bunny character Harvey in Aghwee The Sky Monster...
yet... every single Japanese author voice
is radically different from the others
you could not confuse even for a sentence
the words of Murakami, with Abe, or Ōe
even if being all so modernly Japanese...
but then after getting some e-remainders
about Paul Bowles, and needing a break from
Ōe, last night i decided to use Bowles
as a modern-Japanese-intensity chaser...
reading my used copy of Paul Bowles Collected Stories on my little patio
& chubby mourning dove hanging out on electricity cable, behind
& oh it worked!... I've read a couple of Bowles
the Collected Stories a while ago, when i bought
this pretty copy (i think the covers are made of Canson paper)
only this time I payed more attention
he sounded so much familiar than Ōe!!
but of course, not only the native writing
in English, that in spite of not being my first language
it surely is my second... made it easier than reading
the awkwardly formed sentences of Ōe
being translated from Japanese
but also sure helped that the landscape
narrated was undoubtedly my country Mexico
or a latin/mexican lost paradise in Bowles mind
and the fact that the characters has names like
Señora Sanchez, señora Lucha, Federico, y Roberto
and said phrases like "A veces..."
Paul Bowles sounds timeless, and wise...
and legendary!, like García Márquez or José Saramago
those authors that read like they are writing
"from above..."
and yet Bowles is refreshingly more humane
not sure how to explain...
magical Bowles and his
"The dinning room smelled of kerosene and oranges."
and his
"The night was thick with eternity."
Eternity indeed mister Bowles! i say...
and a sound thank you to my dear friends
for their soulful recommendations of authors
and the gifts of books
they are like smiles for the soul
oooooh Ziggy played guitar
David Bowie's Ziggy Stardust is one of my favorite songs
strangely is not the original song by Bowie that i favor
but the cover by Bauhaus
i don't tend to like covers, but Ziggy is one of those rare songs
when the cover is better than the original
or so i think, so when i came across this little '45
i bought it... i do have a turntable, you know?
here to Ground Control's and your consideration
ahh the glam rock era
strangely is not the original song by Bowie that i favor
but the cover by Bauhaus
i don't tend to like covers, but Ziggy is one of those rare songs
when the cover is better than the original
or so i think, so when i came across this little '45
i bought it... i do have a turntable, you know?
here to Ground Control's and your consideration
ahh the glam rock era
Monday, February 01, 2010
no ceiling
there was a time while i was living in Mexico City
that i used to like Pearl Jam
then my "densos" (hard-core) rock friends pointed
some of their 'faults' to me
and for one reason or another, i stopped following them
but i always like Eddie Vedder's lamb-like voice
meeeeh meeeh he goes, and i like it
and then one day i watched Into the Wild
a great film directed by Sean Penn, and etc. etc. etc
since then i recovered some certain admiration for Vedder
who wrote the score music and soundtrack of the film
i don't think the songs are musically the best
but the lyrics, the darn lyrics are really good
so Vedder is a cute lamb and a poet too!
also he played most of the instruments during the recording
i didn't know he could play the banjo and i really
like the banjo sound on this track
here to match my last-week California winter shot
No Ceiling, a short yet lovely banjo song
Comes the morning
When I can feel
That there's nothing left to be concealed
Moving on a scene surreal
No, my heart will never, will never be far from here
Sure as I am breathing
Sure as I'm sad
I'll keep this wisdom in my flesh
I leave here believing more than I had
And there's a reason I'll be, a reason I'll be back
As I walk the hemisphere
I got my wish to up and disappear
I've been wounded, I've been healed
Now for landing I've been, for landing I've been cleared
Sure as I am breathing
Sure as I'm sad
I'll keep this wisdom in my flesh
I leave here believing more than I had
This love has got no ceiling.
Sunday, January 31, 2010
Thursday, January 28, 2010
J. D. Salinger dies and I was Holden Caulfield once
growing up in Mexico my required high school reading was very different from the American one, we didn't read Shakespeare, but Cervantes for example, etc. so Salinger came late into my life
i remember back in 2003, 2004, i was living very harsh times in San Diego, i was unemployed, broke, and going through a mid-life crisis, having to roommate with a dear friend in order to be able to pay the rent, but it was not only the money situation, but in general my personal life, i was angry, confused, looking for direction without even knowing it... so one day, looking for meaning and help, i went to Downtown Mental Health, i got a shrink for free and antidepressants and sleeping pills, the whole American dream, sort of speak... the place was rather depressing, i was the "happy" case of the institution, if you ever dare to step your head on a government free mental health facility, you'll see that there is mostly homeless people there, hard-core drug addicts, old people with Alzheimer, and very sad cases, but i wanted some direction, some help... and it was on those days that i read The Catcher in the Rye... couldn't think of better timing, me rebelling to the world, looking for direction, Holden rebelling to society, to adults and life... i remember reading the book outside the mental health facility while waiting for my shrink appointments.... it was delightful, full of crisis and bad moods, i was my own Holden!!!
those days are long gone, and thank God i got off those pesky antidepressants and sleeping pills earlier than hooked, i used them for barely 7 months, and i was very happy to realize i didn't need any pills to be myself... yet sadly psychiatrists and psychologists, specially the ones handling the bulk of humanity give you pills rather easily, in my case, i just needed to get over myself, exercise, find a job, and go on with my life, instead of barking at it endlessly... as i thankfully did, & surely "with a little help of my friends", thankfully...
anyway, i learned much from those days, i went through things that i didn't have to face while i was growing up in Mexico City where my mom was always there to rescue me, i wouldn't change those days... and now i only need a couple of yoga meditations, a long walk, a good song, & an occasional carrot cake (or apple pie with some hot black café or a delightful black té) to calm down & smile at life, and myself
but oh dear! how i miss sometimes the personal drama, not that i look for it anymore, but those intense feelings, even if awful, were rather deep, it was an exhausting adventure to be myself, day after day... and, overall i miss Holden, feeling so loony like him those days
rest in peace J. D. Salinger, i thank him for creating this full-of-Angst teenager, with who we can all relate, specially while questioning the crazy 'order' of society, all the strange things that happen in this world, and the rules we impose ourselves, for portraying so well those days when you really "are in trouble" and the impermanency of things, of life...
Salinger is dead, yet Holden Caulfield will forever live in the hearts of any tortured souls, teenagers like him, or old like me, out there
here a couple of my favorite Holden quotes
"What I like best is a book that's at least funny once in a while...What really knocks me out is a book that, when you're all done reading it, you wish the author that wrote it was a terrific friend of yours and you could call him up on the phone whenever you felt like it. That doesn't happen much, though."
"Goddam money. It always ends up making you blue as hell."
"Boy, when you're dead, they really fix you up. I hope to hell when I do die somebody has sense enough to just dump me in the river or something. Anything except sticking me in a goddam cemetery. People coming and putting a bunch of flowers on your stomach on Sunday, and all that crap. Who wants flowers when you're dead? Nobody."
-J. D. Salinger, The Catcher in the Rye, Holden Caulfield
i remember back in 2003, 2004, i was living very harsh times in San Diego, i was unemployed, broke, and going through a mid-life crisis, having to roommate with a dear friend in order to be able to pay the rent, but it was not only the money situation, but in general my personal life, i was angry, confused, looking for direction without even knowing it... so one day, looking for meaning and help, i went to Downtown Mental Health, i got a shrink for free and antidepressants and sleeping pills, the whole American dream, sort of speak... the place was rather depressing, i was the "happy" case of the institution, if you ever dare to step your head on a government free mental health facility, you'll see that there is mostly homeless people there, hard-core drug addicts, old people with Alzheimer, and very sad cases, but i wanted some direction, some help... and it was on those days that i read The Catcher in the Rye... couldn't think of better timing, me rebelling to the world, looking for direction, Holden rebelling to society, to adults and life... i remember reading the book outside the mental health facility while waiting for my shrink appointments.... it was delightful, full of crisis and bad moods, i was my own Holden!!!
those days are long gone, and thank God i got off those pesky antidepressants and sleeping pills earlier than hooked, i used them for barely 7 months, and i was very happy to realize i didn't need any pills to be myself... yet sadly psychiatrists and psychologists, specially the ones handling the bulk of humanity give you pills rather easily, in my case, i just needed to get over myself, exercise, find a job, and go on with my life, instead of barking at it endlessly... as i thankfully did, & surely "with a little help of my friends", thankfully...
anyway, i learned much from those days, i went through things that i didn't have to face while i was growing up in Mexico City where my mom was always there to rescue me, i wouldn't change those days... and now i only need a couple of yoga meditations, a long walk, a good song, & an occasional carrot cake (or apple pie with some hot black café or a delightful black té) to calm down & smile at life, and myself
but oh dear! how i miss sometimes the personal drama, not that i look for it anymore, but those intense feelings, even if awful, were rather deep, it was an exhausting adventure to be myself, day after day... and, overall i miss Holden, feeling so loony like him those days
rest in peace J. D. Salinger, i thank him for creating this full-of-Angst teenager, with who we can all relate, specially while questioning the crazy 'order' of society, all the strange things that happen in this world, and the rules we impose ourselves, for portraying so well those days when you really "are in trouble" and the impermanency of things, of life...
Salinger is dead, yet Holden Caulfield will forever live in the hearts of any tortured souls, teenagers like him, or old like me, out there
here a couple of my favorite Holden quotes
"What I like best is a book that's at least funny once in a while...What really knocks me out is a book that, when you're all done reading it, you wish the author that wrote it was a terrific friend of yours and you could call him up on the phone whenever you felt like it. That doesn't happen much, though."
"Goddam money. It always ends up making you blue as hell."
"Boy, when you're dead, they really fix you up. I hope to hell when I do die somebody has sense enough to just dump me in the river or something. Anything except sticking me in a goddam cemetery. People coming and putting a bunch of flowers on your stomach on Sunday, and all that crap. Who wants flowers when you're dead? Nobody."
-J. D. Salinger, The Catcher in the Rye, Holden Caulfield
Tuesday, January 26, 2010
The Eternal... rocks!!
after a couple of months of having it
and many times of listening to it...
i can say that i am finally acquainted with
Sonic Youth's The Eternal
all i have to say is: WOW!!
i love ALL of Sonic Youth albums,
yet the latest albums have been OK
i think Murray Street was the last of the
latest favorite albums they put out...
Sonic Nurse and Rather Ripped are good,
but not superb, not for my taste
they are good albums,
but they don't completely "rock"
The Eternal... rocks!!
to confess, since Washing Machine,
i haven't been blown away by them
i've been very happy that they haven't sucked
and that they are still very good
at what they do, in spite of the ripe age...
sure they have appeared in Gilmore Girls
and Gossip Girl TV shows
but they have never disappointed me!!
their solo projects are solo so great!
now The Eternal... is a great Sonic Youth album!!
it tastes like the "old ones", even like Sister!
every single song in The Eternal reminds me of
why Sonic Youth were, are, and will be
my freaking favorite band!!
the album sounds like a lot of Sonic Youth albums, yet like none
each song reminds me of a different stage on the Sonic career
i feel they "consolidated" themselves in this album
there are elements of Sister,
entrances that remind me of Evol
and angry punkness like in Confusion is Sex
The Eternal feels punk, feels trashy, yet polished trash...
it's catchy trash sometimes, but still trash, noisy, and good!
like a rock album should be
it sounds like the good old Sonic Youth from 'back then'
i mean, some hard-core fans could argument that punk
shouldn't be catchy... but wasn't Diamond Sea
a ballad after all??? at least the first 5 minutes of it...
and then, a sea of diamond noises followed
(jaime!!)
Sonic Youth's best songs have always been catchy
but for me, that's one of the huge accomplishments
to create a song, a melody,
out of those freaking noises and feed-backs
it's the most structured and beautiful noise one can think of...
anyway, i feel about Sonic being old and yet good
as we say in Mexico:
El diablo sabe más por viejo que por diablo.
The devil knows more due to being old than by being the devil...
now i only regret having arrived late to the past show in January
i can't wait to see them live again!...
Lee Ranaldo was barely 5 steps from me
ahhh i wish i was there again!!
and i wish one day i could hug Steve Shelley and tell him
you the best drummer in the world (that is after you Beto!!)
and to Lee, that he's the last of the beat poets
holding a guitar instead of a pen
little sample? Kim Gordon as punk as ever
sings the opener track Sacred Trickster
and many times of listening to it...
i can say that i am finally acquainted with
Sonic Youth's The Eternal
all i have to say is: WOW!!
i love ALL of Sonic Youth albums,
yet the latest albums have been OK
i think Murray Street was the last of the
latest favorite albums they put out...
Sonic Nurse and Rather Ripped are good,
but not superb, not for my taste
they are good albums,
but they don't completely "rock"
The Eternal... rocks!!
to confess, since Washing Machine,
i haven't been blown away by them
i've been very happy that they haven't sucked
and that they are still very good
at what they do, in spite of the ripe age...
sure they have appeared in Gilmore Girls
and Gossip Girl TV shows
but they have never disappointed me!!
their solo projects are solo so great!
now The Eternal... is a great Sonic Youth album!!
it tastes like the "old ones", even like Sister!
every single song in The Eternal reminds me of
why Sonic Youth were, are, and will be
my freaking favorite band!!
the album sounds like a lot of Sonic Youth albums, yet like none
each song reminds me of a different stage on the Sonic career
i feel they "consolidated" themselves in this album
there are elements of Sister,
entrances that remind me of Evol
and angry punkness like in Confusion is Sex
The Eternal feels punk, feels trashy, yet polished trash...
it's catchy trash sometimes, but still trash, noisy, and good!
like a rock album should be
it sounds like the good old Sonic Youth from 'back then'
i mean, some hard-core fans could argument that punk
shouldn't be catchy... but wasn't Diamond Sea
a ballad after all??? at least the first 5 minutes of it...
and then, a sea of diamond noises followed
(jaime!!)
Sonic Youth's best songs have always been catchy
but for me, that's one of the huge accomplishments
to create a song, a melody,
out of those freaking noises and feed-backs
it's the most structured and beautiful noise one can think of...
anyway, i feel about Sonic being old and yet good
as we say in Mexico:
El diablo sabe más por viejo que por diablo.
The devil knows more due to being old than by being the devil...
now i only regret having arrived late to the past show in January
i can't wait to see them live again!...
Lee Ranaldo was barely 5 steps from me
ahhh i wish i was there again!!
and i wish one day i could hug Steve Shelley and tell him
you the best drummer in the world (that is after you Beto!!)
and to Lee, that he's the last of the beat poets
holding a guitar instead of a pen
little sample? Kim Gordon as punk as ever
sings the opener track Sacred Trickster
Thursday, January 21, 2010
Conan O'Brien
since i moved to the US, back in 2001
i stayed late to see what Conan O'Brien was babbling about
i learned 'funny' English and to laugh with him very late at night
Conan was one of those symbols from New York City for me
and then they moved him to Los Angeles to do the Tonight Show
i was somehow sad 'cause i relate Conan with NYC
but it was OK, after all i don't care for Jay Leno
nor for any other late shows or talk shows anyway...
i am a PBS viewer, and a Turner Classics Movies fan
with some dose of Law & Order SVU now & then
and other silly stuff
(hey!! nobody is perfect!)
but from late night TV i only cared
for this quirky skinny tall red-haired man
who used to write for The Simpsons
and now... after getting him out of NYC
they are bringing back fat simpleton Leno
to the Tonight Show
and leaving Conan with plenty of money
but without a TV show...
am gonna miss Conan!!!
and his great irreverent sense of humor
tomorrow is his last show
TV was bad,
it just got worse...
i stayed late to see what Conan O'Brien was babbling about
i learned 'funny' English and to laugh with him very late at night
Conan was one of those symbols from New York City for me
and then they moved him to Los Angeles to do the Tonight Show
i was somehow sad 'cause i relate Conan with NYC
but it was OK, after all i don't care for Jay Leno
nor for any other late shows or talk shows anyway...
i am a PBS viewer, and a Turner Classics Movies fan
with some dose of Law & Order SVU now & then
and other silly stuff
(hey!! nobody is perfect!)
but from late night TV i only cared
for this quirky skinny tall red-haired man
who used to write for The Simpsons
and now... after getting him out of NYC
they are bringing back fat simpleton Leno
to the Tonight Show
and leaving Conan with plenty of money
but without a TV show...
am gonna miss Conan!!!
and his great irreverent sense of humor
tomorrow is his last show
TV was bad,
it just got worse...
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